Fed up with those boring, mind-numbing lists that mostly state whatever a critic thinks he should have liked best that year? Good, so are we. We want to tell you a bit of info the things that we actually gave a crap about in 2006 rather than, say, make another list where we give the last Bob Dylan album way more credit than it deserves. You know, like everyone else does. Seriously, did we miss a meeting about Modern Times? Anyway, this first installment will be mostly music-centric, but our upcoming lists may be a bit more varied. Or not. They haven’t been written yet, so we’ll see. Without further hesitation, here’s our end-of-the-year thoughts!

Best Album For Listening To While On Morphine:
The Album Leaf - Into The Blue Again

I’m not as shallow as the category I filed this album under might lead you to believe. Into The Blue Again is just a really gorgeous, relaxing album. A perfect soundtrack to drifting away in a chemical haze, letting all of the day’s problems evaporate while you float around on an codeine-induced cloud.

The Album Leaf - Always For You.mp3

Best UK Album Reissue Of The Year:
Art Brut - Bang Bang Rock & Roll

It took nearly a year, but the debut album by the first worthy heirs to The Modern Lovers throne landed on US shores to a feeding frenzy of kids straved for three chords and the nasal truth. The album flies by in thirty minutes of honesty-sans-sarcasm and never seems less than geniune. If you want my honest opinion, this might be a good contender for ‘best rock album of the decade’. Of course, I put the emphasis on the word ‘rock’. Don’t listen to this album unless you want your life changed, kids.

Best Album For Living Room Dance Parties:
The Blow - Paper Television

The most enjoyable minimalist dance album I’ve heard in ages. It’s not only brimming over with melodies that you simply can’t believe haven’t been written yet, but the beats even get this anti-dancefloor fool tapping his reluctant toes. Not a single out-of-place tune or lull in the entire thirty minutes, which might seem important, but you’d be amazed at just how classy album-filler has become recently.

Best Proof that Pitchfork’s “Best New Music” Category Isn’t Always Wrong:
I’m From Barcelona - Let Me Introduce My Friends

Can we stop with the Polyphonic Spree comparisons, already? Just because the band has enough members to fill small clubs to capacity before a single ticket is sold doesn’t mean that I’m From Barcelona has anything else in common with the choral arrangements of the Spree. All you’ve got here is some finely crafted Swedish indie pop that demands repeated listenings and a proper stateside release. For once, all the hype was warranted.

I’m From Barcelona - We’re From Barcelona.mp3

Most Pretentious Album Of The Year:
Johann Johannsson - IBM 1401: A Users Manual

Just watch the video and listen to Johannsson’s interview. You’ll understand.

Best Album Of 2006 By A Guy I Wouldn’t Let In My House:
The Lemonheads - S/T

A few weeks ago, some fans on the www.lemonheads.co.uk message board alleged that a listless Evan Dando hurled a chair at some audience members that made the inexcusable mistake of asking for an encore. Of course, the webmasters of said site locked the thread in hopes that the rumor would disappear into obscurity. This type of spin control has been going on in the Dando camp for longer than I’ve been a fan and I’m so tired of it that I haven’t played any of his records since. I’m that odd sort of music fan that has to respect the artist in question in order to enjoy their records. Think about it, if you book a show and you throw a chair at an audience member, you’re not only gonna get arrested, but you’re probably gonna go to jail on top of it. Ah, but Evan the choirboy has people working one step ahead of his lunacy as if they were a protective forcefield insuring that the guy somehow stays above the law. While he’s a great songwriter, and this album - the first Lemonheads record in ten years - proves that he hasn’t lost his chops, isn’t it about time that he had to answer for some of his actions towards the people that pay his rent? Heck, we’d even take a simple “I didn’t do it” at this point, Evan.

Here’s a clip of the aforementioned show in Rome. His performaces lately have been described as ‘lackluster and tired’. You be the judge.

Most Insidiously Great Album Of The Year:
Mates Of State - Bring It Back

I wasn’t expecting it. The prior three albums by Mates Of State were always good, don’t get me wrong, but I found the dueling melodies between Kori Gardner and boyfriend Jason Hammel to be a bit shrill and directionless after long periods of listening. The never ending midrange of Kori’s gurgling organ didn’t help either, but something was different this time around… the hooks were tighter and Mates Of State was more finely in tune with their craft than ever before. Any naysayers simply need to hear the vocal round at the end of “Think Long”. They’ll sut up really quickly, once and for all.

Best Song I Didn’t Want To Like But Ended Up Loving Anyways:
Pipettes - “Your Kisses Are Wasted On Me”

I’m a sucker for a good hook, but my problems with The Pipettes are far too numerous to list here. I will say that I get a bit miffed at the ‘indie rock’ tag they get saddled with, as the song is about as commercial and predictable as they come, not to mention the fact that the three gals in this band are the very type that laughed at the fans of said genre back in high school, I’m sure. They come across as terribly smarmy and their stage presence seems almost as if they’re thinking ‘boy, these people sure are lucky to be seeing us’. All that aside, this song is incredibly catchy, and even though their limited sound doesn’t afford them much room to grow and prosper, if they simply drop the attitude/posturing The Pipettes could be exactly what their debut record proves that they are - really, really good pop singers.

Most Prolific Artist That Actually Churns Out Quality Material Of 2006:
Robert Pollard

No, seriously. We all know that ex-Guided By Voices mastermind Robert Pollard is way better than he oughta be considering how much music he releases in a year, but *fuck*. This year we got three great albums under assumed names (Psycho & The Birds, The Keene Brothers, and the amazing Takeovers), an EP that wasn’t so hot (the Check Your Zoo fiasco), and two jaw-droppingly-fantastic albums under his birth name. Oh, and the live album. While many people pledge their allegiance to his insanely great double-opus From A Compound Eye from this year, my personal favorite was his succinct pop masterpiece Normal Happiness. It was jangly and shimmering, and it covered nearly every pop hook that hadn’t yet been written. With his refusal to tour in the foreseeable future, Pollard has no less than seven albums lined up for 2007… and that’s only current as of this writing. He’s a bleedin’ genius and his output is getting more and more unstoppable. As long as he’s churning out albums of this quality, I don’t mind if he never makes another personal appearance again, personally.

Best Album By A Band That’s Barely Even Together… I Think:
Snowglobe - Oxytocin

I know, weird category, right? Considering that Oxytocin is basically a solo record by Brad Postlethwaite and the fact that the band has done less than ten shows to support it’s release, it’s hard to even be sure whether or not you can call Snowglobe a band anymore. One thing is certain though, Oxytocin is full of gorgeous, life-affirming songs seemingly stripped from a southern baptist hymnal at times. While the record had a strong start on college radio upon its initial release, it seems as if the hype machine has all but forgotten this record by Snowglobe. It just ain’t fair, man. The record is brilliant.

Snowglobe - Rainbow.mp3

Best “Where The Hell Did These Guys Come From?” Album Of The Year:
Tenki - We Are Not Talking About The Universe, Are We?

If Sun Ra’s Arkestra were an indie rock band, the opening cut on this album - “Etaples” - would be their equivalent to “Nuclear War”. Or something. I didn’t think that statement out very well beforehand. However, it’s a crime that such an expansive, ebb-and-flow album like this one can fly so far off the radar, to the point where simply finding information about the band (beyond their own MySpace, natch) is a chore. This unfairly overlooked gem is both sprawling and concise at a sparse thirty-two minute running time, but it’s play-me-over-and-over-ability factor is simply immeasurable.

Tenki - Etaples.mp3

Best Aging Rocker Album Of The Year:
The Who - Endless Wire

Sure, “In The Ether” and “Trilby’s Piano” aren’t exactly Pete Townshend’s finest moments, but considering just how much worse this album could have been, it’s a damned winner in my book. Half of it’s a grab-bag of rocky and folky origins, half is a commendable mini-opera that may just be the best note a band has ever bowed out on. Endless Wire isn’t your father’s Who, nor is it yours. It belongs soley to Pete Townshend, who was nice enough to let Roger Daltrey place his creaky vocal cords over the top of gems like the seething “Man In A Purple Dress”, the oughta-be-a-single “We Got A Hit”, and perhaps the most raging rocker ever written by a man in his sixties, “Sound Round”. There have been rumors floating that the band may even be working on a follow-up to Wire, but guys… if you can’t come up with a better song to close out your career with than this album’s tearjearking “Tea And Theater”… save it for a Townshend solo album. Please?

(more to come… and by the way, regular updates will resume in early January!)